Navigate Life's Changes with Tanya

When we sit with FEAR, truth emerges

When we sit with FEAR, truth emerges
Get into my coaching group for November and December for only $11!!!  (enter 'thank you' in the coupon code)
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How to help our children with fear

How to help our children with fear
There's a fine line between scaring our kids and allowing them to build resiliency.  

First, a story.
I took a group of kids from a nearby school on a mindful leaf hunt.  At one point, I stopped to offer a silent walk.  The task was given to take turns walking at a time spaced about 100 feet apart.  I went first and employed a student leader to send the next.  See, at this school, the kids are trusted and their leadership skills are developed.

It was a straight shot in the trail, but along a creek and surrounded with trees so there was little visibility.  However, I could see the majority of the group as I looked back.

The kids were reminded to use our mindful senses of breathing, listening, and feeling the ground beneath them.  I was promptly told that this is not a 'silent' walk, there are sounds all around.  Well, geez, kids are amazing creatures!!

Well, as we reflected, I was taught some valuable lessons that day!  Kids are not trusted enough AND we are building fear within them.

These are the things that they told me when asked about feelings that arose.
"I felt proud because I felt like an adult."
"I felt scared because I'm not used to being alone."
"I felt worried because other (younger) kids were left behind."
"I felt happy to be walking in the woods."
Everyone's feelings were valid and we learned so much that day!

They are capable.  They can do scary things.

Some things I learned this week about allowing our kids to work through fear.

1. If they are not given any opportunities to experience fear, they will not be able to experience growth.

We often shelter our children from situations that will cause them discomfort in some way.  What if you gave them an age appropriate task and told them, "I trust that you can do this?"
Does this show them that you are scared?  Does it show them that they are not trusted?
No, it gives them confidence.

As they go about the task, they feel capable. They feel proud.  If they reach a stumble or a moment of self-doubt, they have your encouraging words, "I trust you."  They start to trust themselves.

2. Processing strong emotions shows that it's ok to feel all the feels.  

When a stumbling block arises or a fear arises, let's discuss that.  Ask, "what did you feel as you finished your task?"  Try not to judge or give your own projections.  Just be a listening ear.  It will amaze you at what kids come up with.  End the conversation by seeing if they have a new strategy for dealing with the fear next time.  Something that may help them face it head on.

Then....trust.

Your adult children will thank you!

Need some help with routines? 

If you need help navigating your own fears, please hop on over to my Facebook group where we share stories of loss, fear, big changes, and big emotions.


Grab the Free PDF 15 Ways to Build Self compassion here

Gratitude is how you make the grass greener on your side!

Gratitude is how you make the grass greener on your side!
It's important to me for my kids to be happy and content with the lives that they were given.  And I hope they develop with value as well.

This means that gratitude practice had to be a main focus in our family!
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Chronic back pain have you feeling blue? I totally get it!

Chronic back pain have you feeling blue?  I totally get it!
🌖This month's oil for Full Moon yoga. We added a drop to our tea and enjoyed the earthy aroma and flavor! I'm excited to use Copaiba this winter for my achy needs.

There is nothing worse for mental health than chronic pain.  That's why I make pain management a priority in my life!

🌬
Every winter, I struggle with aches and pains, headaches, and fatigue. Last year, I discovered a  muscle rub that I love! Anytime, my neck felt stiff and achy, I would rub the muscle rub on and sleep so much better! 

Also, a daily magnesium, vitamin d, vitamin b, and omega 3 has been wonderful for the unrest I've been feeling in my body. I take a shot of my antioxidant juice with them. It really takes the edge off during the homeschool day when wine isn't an option!

🍵So, this year, I'm trying cobaiba vitality oil in my coffee or tea since I really enjoy the flavor. It can be added to a veggie capsule too!

Here's a great blog all about Copaiba's uses!
https://www.youngliving.com/blog/young-living-copaiba-essential-oil/

Want to order some?  Hop on over here and enter my member number (14813480) at checkout so I can continue to provide my education and coaching services!  I promise that I'm not pushy!!

Need more help with inflammation?  Learn about Ningxia Red juice.  It's a staple in my diet now!Learn More

Grab the Free PDF 15 Ways to Build Self compassion here

Do you have an inconsolable baby or child?

Do you have an inconsolable baby or child?
In our house, having essential oil rollers around for certain needs is a must!

Not only do they ease the kids' worries, but I'm remaining more calm because we have a resource for each problem that arises.
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Meet Tanya Milano Snell

 
Becoming a wife and mother was so exciting for me. I had so much love to give and I strived to always find solutions to life's bumps in the road. From cloth diapering to buying as much organic or local food as we could I was trying to keep us as healthy as possible. I found products that I liked at online stores and corporations, big box stores, local shops, and local farms.....you name it, I was using it all and it was complicated. I also stressed the importance of self care so my husband and I can be there for our kids and for our community, but there just never seemed much time for this.

So, then came a series of traumatic events in our life. First, the death of my mother in law after a long illness followed 2 years later with the death of both of my parents from cancer. Having 2 young kids (one of which was diagnosed with asthma) and navigating this time in our lives was nothing short of a miracle. We have so many friends and family to thank for this! We were maintaining self care (honestly, my yoga practice was crucial) and healthy living as best we could given our circumstances or at least that's what I thought.

In the summer of 2018, my husband was hospitalized with severe gastrointestinal problems. After a week in the hospital, we received a diagnosis of Crohns disease. On the day of his release from the hospital, I was a mess. My body and mind had HAD enough. I didn't know how we were going to manage all of these changes. I cried all day!! I felt like I couldn't be strong for the one person that was strong through all of our battles so far.  In the next few months, we had new food to buy, new supplements, new medical bills, and the list goes on. I was having daily headaches, irregular bowel movements, and increased anxiety. Bills and shopping were so hard to keep up with. It was time to make some decisions for the whole family. 

I realized that staying in the teaching field was unsustainable to my well-being and detrimental to my family's well-being.  I chose to really listen to my intuition, strengthen the practices that help me listen, and follow the path that I was being led to follow.  Leading and living from the heart was the only option.  My love for what yoga does for my mind, body, and soul was the missing piece to my puzzle on how to make all my passions and dreams a reality.

Today, I have much less stress because I have developed a self awareness that keeps me from self abandonment (SacredSeat and SafeSeat practices). I sleep better. I have much fewer headaches and muscle pains. My anxiety is managed and I worry less about providing what my family needs for proper nutrition. And best of all, I now have a self care routine so that I can be there for my family and their needs. I also have more time for the things that I enjoy doing like reading, playing outside, and family time.


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